Bonds, Hamilton, Dykstra, Rose and…… Schwartzel!

There are probably some people that think Barry Bonds was the victim of an outrageously expensive (some estimates as high as $75-million) ‘witch hunt’ in his recent trial for perjury and obstruction of justice? To me, if an extremely wealthy person can lie to a Federal Grand Jury and get away without being prosecuted, that’d be more expensive.

Reiser was superb

Does anyone wonder if Josh Hamilton actually hurt his shoulder on the head first slide into third base, prior to his mad dash for home? Regardless, isn’t Hamilton one of those doomed ball players, as far as injuries are concerned? NY Daily News columnist Mike Lupica compared him to Mickey Mantle this morning on ESPN’s The Sport Reporters.


To me, the first name I thought of was Pete Reiser, perhaps the most talented player in Dodger history, and a man that could never seem to stop crashing into walls.

Shoot 'em all, Archie.

In an excerpt from All in the Family, we had the brothers Giambi testifying at the Bonds trial about steroids, and the brothers Canseco somewhere out in the Arizona desert making believe they are playing professional baseball. Did any of you catch the fact that Jose is being sued by a promoter because he alleges Ozzie Canseco subbed for Jose at some event?

And you want to be my latex salesman

Lenny "Nails" Dykstra, a favorite of Met and Phillie fans throughout his career was recently arrested and jailed for attempting to buy a stolen car. This came shortly after he was charged with a felony for selling assets out of his (stated) $50,000 estate. Lenny claims debts of $31 million. Did you know that Lenny used to give stock tips? Seriously, Lenny Dykstra. Let’s go back and check out some of those 1986 Mets Lenny teamed with that have had problems as well. We have Doc Gooden, Darryl Strawberry, and Wally Backman. That’s a lot of crash and burn, but Lenny has them all beat right now.

18 days into the MLB season, and things look remarkably as one might expect, with a few interesting exceptions:

-- Two of them are the Kansas City Royals and Cleveland Indians, who are both 10-4, and sitting tied a top the AL Central. I don’t think the Indians will stick around, but the Royals could be pretenders for a stretch. If they can get some quality starts from their rotation and let what looks to be a talented bullpen take over, they will continue to win as much as they lose. At some point, they will start to feed some of their emerging and superb minor league talent into the mix, and just might be a fun story this season?

-- Meanwhile, Minnesota looks terrible, and Joe Mauer will be out for at least 2 weeks. A bigger worry might be Joe Nathan looking like half the closer he used to be, but Matt Capps is there just in case, and the Twins seem to find a way to get in the chase every year. Francisco Liriano needs to become a dominant starter, and a couple of other guys on that staff need to step up too. The Twins starters are mostly pitch-to-contact guys, so Michael Cuddyer at second base isn’t helping either.

-- Of course thousands of Red Sox fans have already jumped off the Mass Ave Bridge over the Sox 3-10 start. Most of them tried to drag Carl Crawford and Clay Buchholz with them. Luckily, it’s a short drop to the Charles River, and there are plenty of crews in sculls gliding by to snag them out of the water. Does anyone really think that Boston won’t go on a tear and win something like 18 out of 23? I have a suggestion for Terry Francona. Put Jed Lowrie in the line up every day until he proves he doesn’t belong, and ask Theo Epstein to find you a better catcher. The Yankees aren’t thriving right now either, though they are hitting, but is anyone willing to bet on Freddy Garcia, Bartolo Colon, and Ivan Nova over the long haul? A-Rod is achy already, and Jeter looks worse than last year.

Ozzie, Master of the F Bomb!

Chicago White Sox Manager Ozzie Guillen was in mid-season form when he had his first big blow up this season at an April 13 post game press conference after his bullpen blew yet another game. The four-letter words flew, and I quote:

"I see the same shit you guys see. Exactly same fucking shit. When we play good, they send those guys to this fucking table and talk to them like heroes. When we fuck it up, I’m the one who has to … sit here and talk to you guys."

In other stories we had Charl Schwartzel winning the Masters, stunning everyone by making 4 straight birdies to finish. I heard that with some of the prize money, he’ll be buying a vowel, spinning the wheel, and guessing "S." Tiger livened up the crowd and the TV numbers swelled, but Woods just doesn’t seem to have the magic anymore. Young Rory McIlroy spun out of control, but he is a very resilient and talented kid who has weathered much tougher things in life than what happened to him on April 10 in Augusta, Georgia.

The Stanley Cup Playoffs have begun, and I know I will watch a number of games if only because they will last into June. Hmm, ice hockey in June.

In the NBA Playoffs, we have all been told how wonderful Derrick Rose is, and it’s all true. Somehow I don’t see them getting to the finals though, as pro ball isn’t college, where one young man (Kemba Walker) can carry a team that far. I’d love to see Oklahoma City play the Chicago Bulls though – it’d be a lot more fun for me than a Laker versus Heat finals, which is what I think we’ll get. Enjoy the ballin’ now, because next year is in serious doubt.

Oh yeah, the Orlando Magic didn’t play last night – Dwight Howard had 46 points and 19 rebounds.

For the record, it snowed here yesterday afternoon – nothing stuck, but it snowed.

Jes sayin…