SAVE LENNY (that con) !!!

Got enuf chaw there, Lenny?

If you ever saw Leonard Kyle Dykstra, AKA Lenny, "Nails," or "Dude," play Major League Baseball, you know that you'll never be able to forget him.

There is a classic line that I first heard describe a couple of hockey players in the NHL, when a teammate called these two (smallish) teammates his "little balls of hate." That was Lenny Dykstra in MLB, perfectly – he was a double dose ball of hate to anyone he played against, but a guy loved by the fans of the team he played on.

Anyone following baseball in the mid-1980’s into the mid-1990’s grew familiar with Lenny, first being a huge part of a New York Mets World Series win in the 1986, and later with the Philadelphia Phillies on the losing side in 1993.

Lenny was about 5’9", and 160 pounds of fidgets, scratching, and ugly hunks of chew falling out his mouth, but he was a great lead off hitter, with speed and (surprising) power, and a very good centerfielder.

Lenny's old roomie

Not long after the Mets drafted him in round 13 of the 1981 amateur draft, he found himself teamed with, and rooming with an outfielder the Mets had drafted at #23 over all, in the 1980 draft. (This was the year the Mets took Darryl Strawberry with the #1 overall pick.) Lenny wasn’t supposed to make it, but his roommate, by all accounts, was destined for greatness. 1^st round draft picks are supposed to become stars.

Turns out they both made it, though Lenny’s roomie, Billy Beane, ended up becoming famous as the General Manager of the Oakland A’s, and the man the Michael Lewis’s book "Moneyball," was all about.

There is an excerpt from Moneyball in which Beane describes himself and Lenny sitting in the Mets dugout, and Lenny asks Beane "Who is that big dumb ass on the hill (warming up to pitch)?"

Turned out Lenny didn’t know who Steve Carlton was, and didn’t care one way or another when he found out.

"Lenny," Beane said, "Carlton has heat and maybe the nastiest slider…ever!"

Just freakin' nasty

"I’ll stick him," was Lenny’s response to Beane’s incredulous answer.

That was Lenny, he didn’t care who you were, as he would impose his will, and you better get the hell outta the way. He had all the confidence in himself he needed, and about 5 other guys besides.

Dykstra’s commonly used nickname was "Nails," which was a good one, because he was a tough little SOB, but "Dude" was actually a better one.

Lenny was a SoCal kid, kind of part surfing stoner Jeff Spicoli, part Pig Pen from Charlie Brown, and part Bernie Madoff. No offense to the ‘other’ Lebowski, but Lenny is a classic example of a California dude – a clueless scuzzball that wants to have a lot of fun, with your money.

Best estimate I have found is that Lenny Dykstra made more than $36,500,000 in his MLB career. It is all gone, lost in any number of schemes that I won’t bother to describe, and there is a mountain of evidence he’s gone through a lot of other folks money too. In an effort to keep the dollars coming in, Lenny embarked on a number of enterprises that caught the attention of law enforcement in the State of California, as well as the IRS.

Currently, Dykstra is in jail in California awaiting trial on enough charges to almost ensure a fairly lengthy prison sentence.

I am not making the following up.

Lenny gets doubled up

There is an actual web site at www.savelenny.com where folks can donate money towards Lenny’s current bail of $50,000. It should be "save lenny that con" but I don’t want to pre-judge the Dude.

I have to admire the man’s confidence though, and the fact that through it all he still has friends (or accomplices?) that were willing to set this up on his behalf.

I have no clue if Billy Beane has kicked in any dollars to help bail out his old roomie, but I am pretty certain Steve Carlton won’t be.

I think that somehow Lenny will get through all of this, but even more than that, I can’t help but think Lenny will just pocket any of the money that may come into the savelenny web site.

Hey dude, let's party.

Yeah, all $17.43 of it.

Good luck Nails, you’ll always be my little ball of hate.

Jimmer Fredette Goes West

I know it’s been about four days since the 2011 NBA draft, and I’m a little late with this post about what happened that night, but I have to admit I was extremely curious to know when, and which team would draft Brigham Young’s Jimmer Fredette?

King for a day, and maybe a lot longer than many think?

I was tired of hearing about how Fredette was this over rated kid who couldn’t play defense, and was destined to become some kind of after thought in what was (by consensus) perhaps the worst ‘crop’ of basketball talent in the history of the draft.

I don’t know how anyone could know whether or not Jimmer can play defense or not, as he was never really asked to do that at BYU. Somehow, being about 75% of Cougar offense every game was considered a big enough load to carry, ya think? Playing defense is a quick way to tire any player out, but somehow Jimmer led his team to a top 5 ranking before an inevitable loss in a crazy NCAA tournament.

My son Matt and I talked quite a bit about the draft and Jimmer, over this past weekend. Matt also thinks the pundits may be selling Fredette short. Matt has no love for Jimmer, having seen him drop huge numbers on his school (Arizona), but he put that aside and talked about the fact that some kids are just winners. Some kids have to work really hard every day to get to the point where they are talented enough to play hoops at a major college or university, so the pressure has always been on them. Some succeed, and many don’t, but nothing breeds success like being successful in any vocation. Working really hard to achieve it would seem to be something any organization would desire?

I've read about Jimmer being compared to the Denver Bronco’s Tim Tebow.

It's not Florida anymore.

Is this profiling?

And if it is profiling, will someone explain to me what these two young men have in common aside from being uncommonly earnest, hard working, and white?

I know that Tebow wears his Christianity proudly, and that’s fine for him and millions of fans. He is one of the most popular players in the NFL. Perhaps there are some who think because Jimmer is Mormon, every other word out his mouth will be about God?

I don’t get it. I mean, Tim Tebow appears to be a genuinely nice young man, but I don’t want him to be the quarterback on my NFL team. He’s got talent, and a can do attitude backed up by all the hard work in the world, I just don’t see him being successful as a NFL QB – any number of other things, "YES! Just not TIM TEBOW -- NFL QB.

On the other hand, Jimmer Fredette has enormous talent as a ball handler and shooter, and is a quick 6’2" guard who will be able to always create a shot for himself. In the NBA, that is really a pretty rare commodity. It’s also my guess that with the kind of quickness Fredette has, teaching someone who works as hard as he does how to play defense won’t be tough at all.

So on Thursday evening, I tuned into ESPN, at about pick #6. A short while later Sacramento Kings worked a deal with Milwaukee, and took Jimmer with the #10 overall pick. I immediately thought it was a good pick for them, as their style is to run and gun, and who better than Jimmer to feed the ball to Tyreke Evans – and vice-versa?

TJ...er, Ben...

I was also impressed with Jimmer’s brother TJ, who I am still convinced is really Ben Affleck. I have had suspicions that Jimmer is really Matt Damon with heavy make up, but I am letting that go.

Ben...er, TJ...

Anyway, TJ mentioned the written vow his younger brother made and signed a number of years ago, in which he promised he’d work really hard as often as he could to someday make the NBA. The fact that it was (seemingly) written in crayon, with lousy printing was a bit disconcerting, but Jimmer did write it out, signed it, and made it happen.

I was a bit disappointed in not seeing the Jimmer and TJ's sister, the lovely Lindsay, but sometimes we all just have to muddle through.

In my opinion, I think Danny Ainge is the best basketball player to have ever played at BYU, and then gone on to a very successful career in the NBA as a player. I think one can compare Ainge and Fredette easily, both were the nexus of over-achieving teams on which they controlled the offense. (If I recall correctly, few thought Ainge would be able to play defense either. Turned out they were correct, but it was more his shoddy play as a third baseman for the Toronto Blue Jays)

I think it’s fascinating to think of Jimmer going to the Kings, and teaming with Hassan, DeMarcus, Donte’, Darnell, Tyreke, and Pooh, among others, and not only being the only white guy on the team, but also the smallest, by far. He’ll be tested every day, in many ways, not the least of which will be culturally.

The coda on all of this is really simple. It’s been shown year after year in all professional drafts of amateur talent that a lot of this stuff is a complete crapshoot.

In an extremely lousy year for talent, Sacramento may have found a gem, or perhaps they have a bit of fool’s gold? We will see, and remember that the media will be on this young man all the time, and he’ll be besieged by autograph seekers at every turn.

So please, TJ, or Ben, or someone…give Jimmer a new, sharp crayon. I think the kid will be a success, and he’ll have a lot of autographs to sign.

Lieutenant Columbo

Peter Falk, dead at the age of 83.

Thanks for those great shows, and rest in peace.



"Uh, just one more thing..."

The Worst Game by the Best Man



Aloysius Joseph Travers

On May 18, 1912, Aloysius Joseph (Allan) Travers was the starting pitcher for the Detroit Tigers in a game in Philadelphia, against the defending World Champion Philadelphia Athletics. Travers pitched a complete game and lost, 24-2. He gave up 7 walks, 26 hits, and 24 runs. Those 24 runs are the most ever given up by a pitcher in one game in Major League Baseball history. It was the first and last appearance Travers ever made in a Major League game.

Over the 142 years and more than 150,000 games in MLB history there have been thousands of fantastic and horrific performances by players in the games they have played.

There have been perfect games and 20 strikeout performances by pitchers, and hitters getting 6 hits, or 4 homers in a game. Similarly, there have been awful displays on both sides, with a batter striking out 5 times in a game, or hitting into 4 double plays. However, with pitchers, things can and sometimes do get infinitely worse, and that’s the subject for this piece.

This year, on May 16, Vin Mazzaro was the starting pitcher for the Kansas City Royals against the Cleveland Indians. Cleveland won the game 19-1, with Mazzaro taking the loss. He gave up 14 earned runs in 2 and 1/3 innings. For that day, and that game, Vin’s earned-run average (ERA) was a neat 54.00. Awful, but not nearly the worst a pitcher can do. (For anyone that doesn’t know, an ERA is calculated by taking the number of earned runs, multiplying that total by 9, and dividing the sum by the number of innings pitched)

Luke needed God's help that day.

There were a couple of beauties in 2006. The Phillies Ryan Madson gave up 9 earned in one inning, posting an 81.00 ERA for that effort, but it pales in comparison to the Royals Luke Hudson’s stinker (also against Cleveland) on August 13, in which he allowed 10 earned runs in 1/3 of an inning. That computes to an ERA of 270.00, which is about the worst performance I can find before we get to all the single-game ERA’s that are "infinite," because the pitcher of record gave up one or more runs, without recording an out. These types of outings are almost an every day occurrence in baseball.

So, what was the story with Allan Travers?

On May 15, 1912, the Detroit Tigers were in New York playing against the Highlanders (now, the Yankees), and a New York fan named Claude Lueker was heckling Detroit star Ty Cobb with profanity and racial slurs. Cobb was perhaps the most reviled man in baseball history, and almost all of his own teammates despised him, but in this instance, to a man, they felt Cobb was justified in going into the stands and beating up Lueker. It happened that Lueker had recently been disabled in a work related accident in which he lost one hand, and 3 fingers of his other hand, so the end result was one that made Cobb out be a worse devil than he actually was, which was no mean feat.

Great player, awful human being

The American League President Ban Johnson suspended Cobb, but Cobb’s teammates to a man supported Cobb’s side of things, and said they would not play another game until the suspension was lifted.

The suspension was to begin on May 18. When Cobb went out on the field he was waved off the field, and his teammates followed. Johnson had threatened to fine Tiger owner Frank Navin, if he didn’t field a team. Fearing a hefty fine, Navin ordered his manager Hughie Jennings to cobble together a team on the chance that his players would refuse to play. Jennings had contacted a local acquaintance named Joe Nolan, who knew Allan Travers, who (in turn) found some sandlot players that would team with a couple of aging Detroit coaches (who were ex-players) to take the field, which is what happened. Everyone felt that the "farce" game would be called off, and perhaps the game would be ruled a forfeit, with the Tigers losing to the A’s? Philadelphia owner/manager Connie Mack saw 15 to 20 thousand fans in the stands, and was loathe to refund such a large gate. The game would be played.

At the time, Allan Travers was a student at St. Joseph’s College, and had never played much baseball. When he found out the Tiger pitcher that day was to receive $50.00 for the game, as opposed to the $25.00 that the other players were to get, he decided to take the mound. Travers, at the time, was more of a musician than anything else. His mother hoped that someday her son would play violin in the Philadelphia Orchestra, but her son chose a different path in life. In 1926, he was ordained, and thus became the only Catholic priest to have ever played in the major leagues. In 1943, he became the Dean of Men at his alma mater, and served in that post until his death in 1968.

There were a few important upshots from this series of events, more than 99 years ago, the first being that umpires would now have the authority to eject abusive fans from the grounds. It also gave impetus to a short-lived players "union."

The suspension was reduced, as was the fine, and Detroit went on with the business of playing baseball.

In Cobb’s home state of Georgia, the State Congressional delegation publicly commended Cobb’s actions in going after Claude Lueker, and stated that they were proud of their native son.

Could two men have been any more different than Tyrus Raymond Cobb and Aloysius Joseph Travers?

One was a son of the devil and the other was to become a man of God?

Oh yes, for those of you keeping score, only 14 of the runs that Travers gave up that day were earned, thanks to 6 errors by Tiger fielders, so Father Travers lifetime ERA in the record book goes down as a neat 15.75.

Quite a different kind of Father's Day story, huh?

Game 7



We all love a kiss, don't we?

That’s what it’s always called in the Stanley Cup Playoffs, "Game seven."

Not the 7^th game, as it’s been called in baseball for as long as anyone can recall, and it’s the same in the NBA, when it gets to one…er, Lebron, take some notes son.

It’s Game 7 of the Stanley Cup Finals tonight in Vancouver, with the Canucks hosting the Boston Bruins, and I have no dog in this fight. I have found myself rooting for Boston because I live in Vermont, Tim Thomas (the Bruin goalie) went to college up here at UVM (the University of Vermont, in Burlington), and I also lived in Boston, Worcester, and on Cape Cod for various stretches of my life.

Hockey remains a very regional thing in this country because a huge number of kids have never played the sport. It’s expensive to play hockey, for all the equipment, and ice time, and many moms (and dads) are averse to watching their kids get pummeled and slashed for weeks on end. It’s also been horribly covered on TV due to National Hockey League (NHL) Commissioner Gary Bettman’s decision to sign a deal with a network few cable systems carry. Add in that many of the players are foreign born, and it remains an afterthought for many sports fans.

Smile Mark!

That is really too bad, because it’s a fabulous sport, played by extremely tough and fantastically skilled players at a frenetic pace. At times the home crowd in attendance will actually charge the arena with unbelievable adrenaline. I have seen the players ‘feed’ off of it, like in no other sport I have ever watched.

The Cup goes for a dip.

The last time Vancouver played in a Stanley Cup game 7 was against the New York Rangers, in 1994. "My" New York Rangers, and "we" won, which broke a drought that had lasted from well before I had been born. I may have been as happy that night, with that win, as much as any I have ever experienced, and I have experienced many championships as a fan. All of my teams have won championships, and some have won multiple times, including the NHL, where a wonderful New York Islander team spun off 4 championships in a row, from 1980-1983.

The other cool thing about tonight, is that Lord Stanley’s Cup will be awarded to the winning team, and someone will etch all the names of the players on that team on the outside of the Cup. Then, the Stanley Cup will begin another odyssey around the country, and maybe even around the world? It’s a trophy that has found its way into the heart of its fan base – to bars and taverns, restaurants and other arenas hosting other games. People get to touch the trophy, and connect a little more to a game they love, and the team that has given them one of life’s ultimate thrills.

I think the puck drops in about 5 minutes, so I am outta here, as I need to fire up the TV, and make myself a long, tall adult beverage, and settle in for a great event.

4 in a row, baby!

I hope you’re watching too.

It's Game 7.

I hate squirrels

I hear there are about 365 known species of squirrels, making it possible to have a new squirrel every day of the year, except leap years.

On Monday, I tried to make it a "leap year" for one squirrel, but the mangy gray rodent got away, but not really. I’ll get to that later.

Did you know that squirrels are from the order "Rodentia?" I didn’t either until I looked it up. I read that there are 1650 different mammals in that (Rodent) order, making it the largest on Earth, comprising about 40% of all living mammals. 40% of the mammals on earth are rats, and squirrels are leading the way!

They're insidious!

"Rodentia" huh? Sounds like "rat" to me.

Look at your basic gray squirrel, and imagine the little bastard with a pointy nose and a hairless tail? It’s a rat, really, and a very stupid rat as well. After all, we wouldn’t use the colloquial "squirrelly" to describe someone we feel is a bit nuts if we didn’t think squirrels were crazy, stupid, or both, would we?

Many squirrels are covered with fleas, and all of them will steal food while they poop in your pantry and then they’ll nest in your attic without a second thought, because they are stupid, filthy little rodents!

Squirrels are not cute…ever. Chipmunks are cute, but they’re rats too. We think Chipmunks are cute because we all love Chip and Dale, but there aren’t any lovable cartoon squirrels, are there?

So, Monday... 

At about 2:00 P.M. that day, I am sitting and reading at my dining room table when I catch some movement out of the corner of my eye. To my left is a window, and there is a squirrel on the ledge.

Big deal, right?

Well yes, as the window ledge is a second floor ledge about 18 feet up the side of a brick building. There is no way for a critter to get to that ledge unless it climbs up about 14 feet of brick, and that’s what this little rat had done.

Before the fall?

I looked at the rat and made a quick move with my body to open the window a bit wider that caused the little bastard to move half off the ledge, like he was some trick rider from an old western movie?  You know, the type of stunt in which the rider seemingly disappears but is really hanging on to the side of the galloping pony?

"What the hellurayadoin?" I asked, as I moved to open the screen, while grabbing a back-scratcher with which to scrape him off the ledge.

The squirrel shuddered, so in my best hillbilly voice I evoked that classic scene in the movie "Deliverance."

I told the rat "You ain’t never gettin to Aintree!"

The scuzzy gray rat had his chance to become the 366^th different squirrel right then. He could have become the "Leap Year" species, but no.  This squirrel, was a coward.

He scrambled along the brick like some weak suck imitation of Spider Rat, red brick dust coating his mangy fur, and got away…or so he thought.

That's Crunch, on the left, like I need to tell you.

I immediately got in touch with my buddies Crunch Hartack and Rock Beafy, and as you can see, they got the piece of garbage…and a half, and his orchestra.

Squirrels are not cute, and now squirrels and their rodent friends and fellow travelers are only 39.999999999% of all the living mammals in the world.

From Crunch, Rock, and myself, you’re welcome.

Good, Bad, and Ugly

...and a Shaqtridge in a Pear Tree

Shaquille O’Neal retires, and will be taking his talents to another vocation

I have pretty much always liked Shaq, except early on when he was still playing for LSU, and "my" Arizona Wildcats had to face him in Baton Rouge during his Freshman year when he was playing for Dale Brown. AZ lost that day, but got revenge the following year in Tucson, and then Shaq went to the NBA and began his run towards MVP’s, NBA Championships, and being fun.

My sense of O’Neal as a person, is a guy of gentle spirit and good will, coupled with a great sense of humor. A man comfortable dressing up in a huge pink Easter Bunny outfit, and visiting poor kids in an East LA day care is a guy I have to like.

SI’s Rick Reilly told a story about when his daughter was about 4 years old, he took her along to meet Shaq. At some point during the conversation, it came up that the little girl’s bedtime was 7:30 in the evening. Later, when Reilly’s daughter asked Shaq if he "was mean," he replied "Not until 7:30."

I can come up with quite a few centers I’d rather have on my all time NBA team than Shaq, but none that were more generous in making sure we were all having fun when he was around. I’m sure we’ll keep seeing and hearing from him, and I look forward to seeing him in the future.

Loser

Jim Tressel quits, and will be taking his hypocrisy to…ESPN?…the NFL?

I don’t think that there are many college football fans that are ever surprised anymore when a major program and coach go down in the flames of multiple NCAA violations, but this one goes a bit beyond the norm for me.

The facts are that Tressel had pretty much always been a cheater when he coached Youngstown State to 4 NCAA Division I-AA titles, but the myopic perspective of the powers that be at Ohio State chose to not see that in Tressel, and they gave him the job.

What makes this a little more loathsome to me is the sanctimoniousness of the man, and all the "Christian values" stuff that went hand in hand with all the cheating and lies.

In this case, it wasn’t (as many have been saying) that the cover-up was worse than the "crime," it was that the guilty party really was a hypocritical scumbag. No small amount of irony that one of Tressel’s nicknames was "Senator." Yeah, him and John Edwards.

I don’t see college coaching in the man’s future, so it has to be ESPN, doesn’t it? Can the guy get a job in the NFL? Does anyone really care what hole this guy crawls into?

Just plain stupid

Brian Sabean implodes, and will be emptying his bank account into Bud Selig’s pocket

A couple of days ago, San Francisco Giants General Manager Brian Sabean was being interviewed on a San Francisco radio station and was heard to say "If I never hear from Cousins again or he never plays another game in the big leagues, I think we'll all be happy."

This was more than a week after Florida Marlin’s outfielder Scott Cousins had bowled over Giant’s catcher Buster Posey on a legal play at the plate, not right after the play, or the game, when emotions were still fairly raw. This was a very stupid and ugly thing for Sabean to say, especially considering that Cousin’s has been receiving death threats, and a Giants fan is still in critical condition after being beaten on opening day after a game in Los Angeles against the Dodgers.

Think what you want Brian, but you can’t say that kind of ugly stuff on the radio.