Penn State's Children

In the past week, a leading news story has focused on the child sexual abuse connected with Penn State, and day-by-day the story has gotten worse. We are hearing about a horrible situation that has led many to believe that there was the worst kind of abuse of power, by Penn State coach Joe Paterno, and many other people on his staff, and in the administration at the University.

The only story in my lifetime that I can reasonably compare this story to is the systematic cover-up of child sexual abuse perpetrated by the Catholic Church for many, many years.

The Penn State story is a lot different in that it’s centered in one spot (for now), and that to many of us that follow sports, having Penn State and Joe Paterno involved shines a enormous light on a problem that is endemic in this country, and throughout the world.

Two days ago, I read that it’s estimated that 1 out of every 4 girls, and 1 of every 5 boys in this country has been a victim of sexual abuse.

In my job as a manager of public housing, I have seen and heard about things that I have reported to the police and to child protective service over the years that are awful for me to recall. I have spoken with mothers whose children were sexually abused, who are now "acting out," and becoming abusers themselves. In some cases these mothers are being evicted from their homes because an adult victimized their child, and now that same child is victimizing someone younger and more vulnerable. I don’t know why this seems to happen so often, but it does.

Similarly, I have assisted individuals that served long prison terms for sex crimes. At these times, I am simply doing my job, because there is a legal imperative with what I do – to treat everyone fairly. I have to admit there have been moments in which I have forgotten what someone has done in the past. I have found myself treating an individual with kindness or empathy that in retrospect I would otherwise find myself wanting to spit on and stomp.

As the story at Penn State continues to evolve, we may find that these crimes involve the disappearance (over 6-years ago) of a District Attorney named Ray Gricar. He had an opportunity to prosecute Jerry Sandusky 13 years ago regarding alleged child molestation. http://www.nytimes.com/2011/11/09/sports/ncaafootball/questions-on-sandusky-wrapped-in-2005-gricar-mystery.html?_r=1

Gricar just vanished. Could it have something to do with a story like this?
http://www.nesn.com/2011/11/jerry-sandusky-rumored-to-have-been-pimping-out-young-boys-to-rich-donors-says-mark-madden.html

Another statistic I have heard this week is that the average male pedophile sexually abuses 109 children in his lifetime, and Jerry Sandusky is almost 68 years old. Is it possible that there are people my age (59), or a bit younger that are living with the memory of Sandusky sexually abusing them?

Of course it’s likely. It’s extremely likely that we have victims from age 8 to age 58.

A big part of the disgust associated with this story is what can only be described as the enabling that Joe Paterno and other employees at Penn State were a part of. It’s seemingly impossible to understand how anyone could not do more, to do something over all this time (13 years), to end this horror.

How many more children were abused in those 13 years? How many of those children are now adults, and acting out, and abusing a new generation of children?

How many lives has one man ruined? How many other lives have been ruined by Joe Paterno and all of his men failing to do the right thing?

Penn State indicates that they have 80,000 students, statewide. About half of those are at school in State College, Pennsylvania.

When about 2000 students gathered to protest Paterno’s firing a couple of nights ago, I am guessing that reasonable people thought it was one of the sorriest excuses for a protest imaginable? In fairness, some stated that they thought Paterno should go, and I do think that there were many students out there that night just to be a part of what was happening.

I wondered how many of those 2000 kids have been abused, and how many may already be, or may become absuers?

Similarly, when Penn State’s football team released a statement that they would give the Game Ball to Joe Paterno if they won their game Saturday versus Nebraska, I felt a bit angry, and a bit sad. Of those 100 or so football players, how many of them voted to give Paterno the game ball because they felt pressured to be part of the team – to go along with something they knew was wrong? How many wanted to stand up and shout, "No, Paterno was a fraud, he didn’t do what he should have done to protect kids when he had the chance!"

How many of those young men have been abused, are abusing now…or will abuse?

I am certain that one reason behind these misguided actions is what is called the "fog of war." This is defined as being in the middle of a fight, and not knowing or recognizing the difference between left and right, night and day, friend or foe, let alone right and wrong. It’s difficult to do anything more than fight for survival sometimes, and when the battle is done, and if one survives, then maybe it’s time to go back and begin to figure out what was right, and what was wrong.

The "fog" is lifting, and I think most of these kids will come around to a different way of thinking, and part of that was displayed Friday night in State College, when an estimated 10,000 students held a vigil for the victims of the abuse. I believe what happened was that many of those young people found perspective. In a very short time many of them gained enough life experience to behave reasonably, and make the correct decision based on evidence, without emotion.

Experience is worthless without the proper perspective, and the willingness and courage to express it.

So how could it be that with too many adults at Penn State that none of that mattered enough for at least 13 years?

I honestly believe that in years to come, because of this horrible story that we will see more being done to stop the sexual abuse of children, and for finding ways for people to come forward with their stories of abuse, and get the help many desperately need. Maybe a bit of good can come out of something so bad, as the fog lifts, and time passes?

The adults failed, but we should not use the same brush on the students. We need to give them a bit of time to adjust, and do the correct thing. It’s very sad that it often takes something bad to be able to do something good, but it is an opportunity to do just that – to use something awful as a wake up call to do something good. To use this story as a way of reaching out to any child who currently suffers, or anyone who has suffered from the worst kind of abuse. I expect that current students at Penn State will be among the leaders in bringing resources and passion to the cause of working to end the abuse.

I think we will ultimately see that happen with many of these young people in State College, and that this will be a defining period in the lives of these students. I believe that in years to come, because of this horrible story that we will get a lot more great things than we would otherwise have expected from Penn State’s children.