Tucson, Arizona

I lived in Tucson for over 26 years, and in many ways, it is 'home' to me, as much as anywhere else I have lived.  My son, daughter-in-law, and her parents reside there.  My son's father-in-law was called to a local hospital to serve as a grief counsellor in the aftermath of the horrific shooting on Saturday.  I have as many friends and family in Tucson, as I do anywhere.

I have felt awful since hearing the news of what happened on Saturday.  In part, I think a large part of me felt this so terribly because it was "my" home, where it happened, and I have no small amount of guilt about being selfish?  I mean, horrible things happen every single day all over the world, don't they?  Do I only feel this badly because of my direct connection to Tucson?

I don't know the answer to that.  Maybe I will know, in time?

Lisa, the author of what follows below is both a friend, and a part of my family.

Gordon and I were having a good weekend. Friday night we went to dinner with our friends Fred and Elyn to celebrate Elyn's birthday. Saturday morning we headed up to Mt. Lemmon with the dogs to enjoy the snow and outdoors. That is where we learned from a former patient of Gordon's about the shooting in Tucson.

We immediately called Fred who worked on Gabrielle's campaign and knew her personally. He was very upset. I had spoken to her at a U of Arizona football game tailgate party in October and told her I was alarmed, and disgusted by the hostility in politics in this state. She agreed that this was a very bad election year. I told her that Tucson would come through for her in the election.

Funny how you can pray for peace, but it doesn't necessarily come to us straightforward?

Last Monday night I had taken part in a meditation for peace and global healing. The event, not affiliated with any religious organization, occurs monthly at a local hotel. It was so well attended that the parking lot was full, and I had to park at a nearby business and walk there. There were people from all over southern Arizona, and many transplants from other states. One thing mentioned, pray for peace and healing, but also, act for it, too.

Expanding outward to the other victims of the shooting, our neighbor, a judge, and our friend Linda, an attorney, knew Judge Roll. Gordon knew and had worked with the MD who helped subdue the shooter and performed CPR. Gordon knew at least 2 other victims, who lived, both very good people dedicated to helping the community.

Someone put up a Gifford campaign sign on the road by our house, people started hanging beads on the sign and placing candles near it. As therapy, last night, I made a white cardboard peace sign and took some beads, found a cholla cactus branch and placed it near the sign. While I was doing this, a kid, about age 14, road up on his bike and we were talking about the events of the day, speculating that perhaps the shooter was mentally ill and had acted alone. He said his tutor's mother had been present and was shot in the arm. He thanked me for putting up the peace sign and talking to him.

We had a small gathering of friends at our house Saturday night to debrief, but it still all seems surreal.

Personally, I was very proud of Sheriff Dupnik for saying the exact truth about the hostility perpetuated in the media.

There's plenty more to say about how messed up this state is -- strangely, it is also the exact opposite too. There are large factions of enlightened people, and many wonderful people who have dedicated their lives to helping others, and creating stability in our society. I was always proud that Tucson is more liberal and tolerant.

- Lisa